fucking tiring man...
gosh gosh gosh.
started night work since last monday.
my night work is referring to 10am in the morning till past midnight.
it can be dragged till past 2+, 3am still at times.
really work till like a dog.
worst than blanglas.

but you know what?
on the 9nov, when the clock striked past midnight,
we celebrated brendan's birthday.
haha! it was so funny! we scared him and
he shouted," nabei chow cb." hahahahaha!
the look on his face was damn hiliarious la...
just couldn't stop laughing.
and later part, all 15 of us, apparently, i'm the only one from morning shift there,
we sat together at one long table and had our supper together.
the feeling was good. it was as though we were one big family.
LOL. and you know what?

brendan and i sat down one day during lunch and we chatted about lots of stuff.
he told me that, that day when we sat down together,
he actually felt like crying because he felt touched.
but of course he didn't if not we'll be thinking he's too drama, actually he is. LOL
i actually felt it too.
one big family, working for one another as well as working towards the same goal.
hard to come by.

sadly to say, we'll be leaving on the 30nov. sigh.
will miss them lots and lots and lots.
especially kas, brendan, paul and remy.

but but but, thank god we aren't involved in the dismantling of the christmas. hahaha!
it'll be hell man... gosh.

i wanna complain!!!
stupid alvin. alvin is a level higher than the manager. don't know what rank also.
anyway, we finished all 30 christmas trees for cp then he showed us the sample, which he wants us to follow. fuck him.
one christmas trees took us about 40mins. no joke.
then now, his assistant sleng, says the 2nd round that we did, still incorrect.
fuck lei. seriously ah, if they could teach us earlier or showed us earlier before we start doing,
we don't have to waste so much time on the christmas trees and re-doing them already lorz.
fuck shit to the both of them.
waste my time. i straight away told brendan i wanna fuck sleng upside down inside out already.
and he was kinda shocked by my language. LOL.
get used to it. ha!

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quarreled with him till damn fierce till i really just wanna end everything off.
couldn't take it anymore.
night work has been straining my energy, mentally and physically already.
and yet, we still quarreled.
teared a few times in the morning because i just couldn't take the stress from both side.
gotta worry about work, then instead of relieving my stress level,
he's adding onto it.
all i could think of at that point of time, was that i really need a break.
i wanted a separation, thinking it might save up more quarrels.

dar: don't always think i don't want you and stuff,ya? i'm not tired of you. i'm just tired of quarreling with you. don't always angry then say all those hurtful stuff. you swear the previous time, but you did it again. sometimes i just don't know whether to believe your words anot, ya... don't always think i wanna break with you. i don't. but sometimes i really felt that i'm left with no choice. like the examples i told you about you not caring and thinking for me, are those true? yes they are. your heart cares. but it's the same as saying it without any actions. last time i admit, you love me more than i do. but now, i guess it's the other way round. that's why small little matters do matter to me, although not to you... and stop thinking that i'm just playing with you. if i am, i wouldn't have put in so much time and effort. for now, i don't know to continue to put in more effort or to take a step back... sigh. sometimes your words and actions are very contradicting.... nvm. we'll see how then... hopefully everything turns out well for us...

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1 more day to our kathy's birthday!!!
hopefully we can meet up soon...
sob sob...
miss the girlies... <3